“They say silence is golden, but perhaps it’s really silver. Chains, they bound, they enclose, they keep me…” – Renee Yohe
This started as a random Facebook note to a writer friend of mine, who I’ve never met in person, but still consider a genuine friend all the same. Recently, she wrote an opinion article about New Years resolutions, and how we can never manage to keep them. It’s such a true observation, isn’t it? Often times, we start out with good intentions. Our enthusiasm’s up and we dive in determined to meet our goal. But as the newness fades, our dedication falters. We start to slack, and before we know it a year has passed, and we’re nowhere closer to that thing we swore we’d do.
Then I came across the opening video to a recent event called Heavy and Light that took place at the House of Blues in Orlando last night. I started to send it to her, along with some personal thoughts when I found my words began to flow a bit deeper than I intended. In fact, I think I had completely zoned out of the message itself and was suddenly typing to myself (I do that a lot). I paused, and nearly hit the ‘delete’ button thinking perhaps it’s too much to send to someone I haven’t even shared coffee with. But then I thought about it, and thought about how many times I bite my lip when I should speak. My boyfriend’s words echoed in my head. “Maybe it’s time you stop holding back.”
Maybe he’s right.
Below is the message I was going to send to her. Instead, I thought I’d share it as a blog.
To be honest, I’ve always scoffed at the idea of ‘resolutions’. It’s the “Jaycent” in me, I think. That pessimism born from bad experiences. From my point of view, New Years always seemed like one big facade, where people make promises destined to be broken. I’ve seen that too many times. Not just on new years, but in places where it really counts. You know, the “good intentions we never keep”, but should’ve?
Then there were some words in this video that really struck me. It was in the part where it said,
“Wouldn’t it be nice if change just took a moment?
Wouldn’t it be nice if it were that easy?
Midnight and we’re new.
Midnight and the past is erased.
Midnight and we’re free.
It seems to come slow.
It seems to be a surgery…”
I think that’s why the resolutions tend to fall to the wayside. When it starts it seems so easy, but when it starts to feel like surgery, so to speak, we let it go. We take the easy route because its less work, or less painful, or just more appealing.
A lot of resolutions are made at midnight, but few are made to last. The promises that count are the ones that mean something. The promises born with the resolve that we’ll fight it out, or fall trying. The all or nothings. Those are the kinds of promises that are worth battling for, whatever the result may be. Whether it’s as simple as getting in shape, or as serious as sobriety, it needs to mean something to us.
Because if it doesn’t matter, why would we care enough to keep it going?
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For those of you who want to see the video I’m talking about, you can watch it below: